The importance of self-care in the chaos of separation & divorce!
Anyone who has ever experienced a relationship ending will appreciate just how much chaos and disruption this brings to your life. Your World is ripped apart, you suddenly don’t know what your future might look like. You may feel grief, hopelessness, fear, shame, uncertainty and even rage!
All of these feelings are completely human and very normal as studies show that humans are a pretty needy bunch who co-regulate with their romantic partner and when this connection is torn, our nervous system is activated. Suddenly we are triggered into flight, fight, fawn response and we are unable to access higher-order cognitive thinking in this state- despite desperately needing to be able to so in order to make the big life-changing decisions you may be confronting!
It is for this reason that calming your nervous system is incredibly important and here are 7 simple self-care practices to help you center yourself amidst the chaos:
Meditation
Meditation is a practice that involves focusing one's attention, clearing the mind, and detaching from thought. The benefits of regular meditation practice can include reduced stress and anxiety, improved focus and concentration, increased self-awareness, and enhanced wellbeing. It's important to note that mediation is a personal practice, and there is no one "right" way to do it.
Embodiment
The practice of embodiment is the process of connecting with your physical body, sensory experiences, and bodily sensations in order to cultivate self-awareness, presence, and a deeper sense of connection. It involves being fully present in the moment and experiencing the body as a source of wisdom and information. There a various methods of embodiment, choose what feels right for you.
Journaling
Journaling is the practice of regularly writing down personal thoughts, experiences, reflections, and observations. It is a form of self-expression and self-reflection. There are several benefits associated with journaling including that it can help with processing feelings and can aid in gaining clarity about your thoughts emotions and dreams. Journaling is also a beautiful way of recording how you have grown.
Fill Your Cup
Filling your cup is a term used to describe the notion of doing the things that nurture you, nourish you, light you up and feed your soul. One easy way to keep your cup full is to have a relaxing bath or even take it further by engaging in a mindful ritual bath practice. Check out my Salts Sage and Selenite Ritual Bath Salt Range here to support your self-care practice.
Connection
We all need connection as human beings and sourcing healthy connections through others is incredibly important when you the bond with your primary attachment figure (your ex-spouse) is broken. And sometimes family bonds are not enough! Reach out to your friends and get involved in community events and activities. And if it calls to you, you can register for one of my deeply nurturing and connecting soul circles here.
Simple Act of Kindness
When we are down in the dumps, being of value to others can really lift our spirits, especially when we help those we see are less fortunate. A simple act of kindness can go a long way not just for the receiver, but also for you in recognising there are always worse things in the world and also, you make a difference in the World!
Acknowledge and Sit with Your Feelings
It can be so very tempting to numb our overwhelming feelings at the best of times, let alone during the grief of a relationship ending. However, it is incredibly important to process our feelings so that they do not erupt in unhealthy ways that incite conflict or get stuck in our body and cause physical symptomology. For many sitting with and acknowledging feelings is incredibly difficult as this developmental skill was not acquired in childhood - however, this skill can be learnt and this is something I empower my clients to learn in my conscious uncoupling coaching and women’s circles.
A large component of the conscious uncoupling process is centered in empowering individuals through various self-care and mindful practices to calm their nervous systems and overcome their most challenging triggers so that they can graduate from any unhealthy patterns of relating that contributed to their the breakdown of their relationship.
I would love to support you on your journey. For more information on my Conscious Uncoupling™ coaching and general separation/divorce coaching services, offerings and programs, click here or book in your free 30 minute discovery call today.
